My Lobotomy: A Memoir

The Abuse and Stigma of Childhood Mental Health Treatment

Howard Dully’s early life is marred by instability, loss, and alienation. After his mother’s death and his father’s remarriage to a cold, abusive woman, he finds himself perpetually misunderstood and ostracized. Dully’s stepmother, unable to cope with his behavior, seeks out psychiatric help. This leads to consultations with Dr. Walter Freeman, an infamous advocate for lobotomies. Despite the absence of serious mental illness, Freeman recommends the procedure, which Dully undergoes at the age of twelve.

Failures and Ethics of the Medical Establishment

The memoir exposes the disturbing reality of the mental health treatment of the era. Dully’s story highlights how children could be subjected to drastic interventions based on insufficient evidence and the subjective opinions of adults around them. The hastiness with which Freeman performs lobotomies, often with little regard to long-term consequences, critiques the era’s medical ethics and the ease with which patients were stripped of agency. Dully’s ordeal exemplifies the consequences of a mental health system more concerned with control than with true healing.

Trauma, Memory, and Identity

In the years following the lobotomy, Dully faces the persistent effects of trauma—struggling with memory lapses, difficulty forming relationships, academic challenges, and a sense of being emotionally muted. The memoir intertwines Howard’s attempts to understand what was done to him with broader questions of how identity and memory survive extreme disruption. His search is also external: he tracks down medical records and interviews people involved in his childhood to reconstruct his past and piece together the truth.

Personal Redemption and Forgiveness

Dully’s journey is ultimately one of personal redemption and self-forgiveness. By confronting his pain and reclaiming his story, he redefines himself outside the shadow of the surgery. The process of sharing his experience—first through radio, then this memoir—reinforces the power of testimony and the human need for understanding and dignity. Dully’s resilience and growth manifest in his ability to forgive and seek connection, finding meaning beyond the suffering imposed upon him.

In conclusion, "My Lobotomy" stands as a compelling narrative about the tenacity of the human spirit in the aftermath of injustice and trauma. Howard Dully’s life bears witness to the failures of psychiatric medicine, but also to the capacity for healing through truth-seeking, reflection, and connection. The memoir poses powerful questions about how we treat vulnerability, what it means to recover, and the dignity that every individual deserves, regardless of their struggles or past.